12: The Hanged Man

Do you remember the whole guilt thing about sex I bought in to when I was a child?  That continued for many many years, all the way up until I was 30, and not skipping even one day.  yay fun..I’m sure you can feel my lack of enthusiasm here.

Well you know those moments in your life when something changes so huge that you are never ever the same after?  The day you really choose to see something from a completely different point of view?  This was one of those days for me.

At that time I was working with an amazing hypnotherapy mentor and I went to his office to tell him that I had met someone and we were going to wait till we got married to have sex.  The funny thing is I went that route with my first marriage and it didn’t work out so well.

Anyway telling him this opened a dialogue about why I believed what I did.  It was here, in a space that I had learned to feel safe and seen, that he said “God does not condemn because god does not judge.” And I said “Of course not!”.  See on some level I knew what he said was true.  That there was not some Being somewhere judging my actions as right and wrong.  There was not some hell I would be sent to for having and enjoying sex.  That I was not some horrible person who deserved hell and damnation.  But how many times are we taught that there are sins of the flesh.  Do you really think God, or the Divine or the Universe is somewhere saying that you shouldn’t enjoy yourself while you have a body?

Since that day I have come to believe that we are all playing in a giant sandbox and the universe doest have a judgement or an opinion about how you play in that sandbox.  You get to choose the life and living that works for you.  If you want to play with others go ahead.  If you love playing by yourself, go ahead.  If you want to throw a fit, go ahead.  If you want to bury your head in the sand, go ahead.

Now I do believe that the Divine would love for you to choose whatever brings you joy however if you really desire to struggle then you have the freedom to choose that too.

Whats even funnier about this whole part of this story is I did end up having sex with the guy I was dating guilt free for the first time EVER and then we broke up.  Only to meet the man I would be with for most of my 30’s.  As soon as I had permission to have all the sex I wanted I get into a long term committed relationship.  Now thats ironic.

Excerpt from Venus’ Upcoming Book Here to Forever


The general overview of the hanged man is seeing something from a whole new point of view.  I like this card because it really is the predecessor to the death card.  First you must see things in a way you never have before which could perhaps feel a lot like seeing things upside-down for the first time.  Its an invitation too be and do things in a completely different way than you ever have before.

What can I be or do different here to have a completely different possibility show up with total ease?
The good news for a hanged man archetype is that seeing things differently comes more easily to them.  The challenge could be that they often feel like the odd person out and don’t fit into the ‘norm’.  They may even feel as though everything in their world seems to be the opposite of everyone else.  Which then makes them feel as though something is wrong with them.  Have you been feeling as though something is ‘wrong’ with you lately?

Would you be willing to consider you are not ever wrong in any way?  And being different or choosing different is the greatest contribution you could be?
The Hanged Man Mantra: Everything is the opposite of what it appears to be, nothing is the opposite of what it appears to be.


Love Yourself You Are Amazing!


Beyond Grateful,




Images from the Shadowscapes Tarot by Stephanie Pui-Mun Law

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